Lolita-MusicBox

What is yours? What is mine? What is a purpose? You think yours is lost, I can't remember mine, Our purpose is a miss. Come back to me, I'll find it with you. We'll have a purpose again, Someday.

People talk about the future, Trap us in something we don't Know (no?) You don't want to be held down. You need to live, love, Grow (go?) In the darkness, Your admission and underlying fear, They make me wonder, They make me think, Clogs in a clock, forever turning. A future. Once upon a time, You and I could have had one together. Now, you and her, And yet, you're unsure of that future. (you don't want it.) And me? Would you come back to me? Could we make it right this time? (Maybe?) The future is not set in stone. Your fears, my wonders, They could exist Or not, But we won't know Until they happen. Until the future comes.

One. Rushing through the school crowds, Seeing you search for your bus, We meet for a frantic moment, A brush of our lips, Just barely. Our first kiss. Two. A date, unbeknownst to me, On a nice December day, We sit in the grass, Watch the sunset, And your lips seal over mine For a moment longer. Our first kiss. Three. "Come with me to the beach?" I ask, Flirting more than I thought. You oblige, come along. Sunshine suits your eyes, Lost and surprised, Yet you play the game I've never heard of. Eyes sparkle as we lean forward And the shade of umbrellas give off The sweetest meeting of lips. Our first kiss. Four. A confession, if I may. Some

I want to rest. I am so tired. I want to lay in your arms, wrapped up warm. I want to hold you in mine, humming a made up tune as you rest your weary eyes. Dream with me, lover. Lay with me, lover. In the quiet of twilight, when the sun has almost left us, let me look to the sky, laying on your chest. Let your heartbeat sing me to sleep. Let your breath steady as we drift off. Eyes close, we move a little closer, warmer now. We are in the in-between, not quite asleep but not quite awake, either. We're on autopilot for the moment. Sleepy, but we exchange quiet kisses, hold a little tighter, mumble incoherent things about the future and p

You are a closed heart. A "fixed point", as you like to say. You like to have a solution But you quiver when there is not one. Some things just are But you don't want to see that. Not yet, at least. You apologize, Sorry for the jumble, Something you're not used to. I listen, Unraveling more and more of a familiar story. You say that no experience is the same, Yet your story rings memories of my past. Memories, echoes of another time. You like me But I am not what you need, Not strong enough, Not stable. But I want to be. I am more than you think, An old soul now. You want to learn how to love? Let my old soul teach you.

Oh, how the times have changed, Where innocent flirting has given way to less innocent insinuations. Where once you were a stranger, and now we are more than two people, stuttering to make conversation. Where we used to be around each other so often, but now I barely see you and I miss being around you. Where I was testing waters around you, wondering if I could trust you, and knowing now that I can. Where I told myself that I wouldn't fall for you, And at some point I realized that oh, I did fall and hard. Times have changed for you and I, and I wonder if the future will hold good for us. One can only wait and see, But changes, however

A melody rings out, soft, beautiful, gentle. Sirius knows the tune and hums along quietly as Orion's fingers glide across the keys with ease. This tune was their favorite and although Ori barely played it, they knew it was their favorite for a reason. On rare occasions when the house was quiet and Orion wasn't being lazy or fussy about the piano, he played. He would always play something soft, something delicate yet simple. The simplicity of the pieces he chose were what always put Siri in a trance of sorts. Not that he wasn't always in a trance with Orion. His brother was so picky about the pieces he played on the piano and hardly liked to

What ails my heart, So fragile, she is, So delicate and soft, Glass. She can be seen through all, She is open and waiting for love to fill her up. What has come over me, That I wait for a man With a glass heart like mine, Wanting to be filled with love. Reunion, that will be our gift, Someday.

I sit here, rocking back and forth, side to side, lost and unseeing. I am not moving, though. I am still, a puddle untouched, stagnating now, in the same old routine. Change that should have been has slipped through my still fingers, barely rippling the surface of my pond. I am still again. I am chasing a shadow, a ghost of a chance that wasn't even there to begin with. On and on, the cycle of repetitive nonsense, the act of going through the motions but not doing anything. I am being left behind, a blip in the presence of your life. I am unchanging, unmoving, no fun anymore, a discarded toy for a few moments of use. You are ever-changing, i

I don't want to. I don't have to. But I should. It's pointless to pine for someone for over a year and be left with nothing. Why am I doing this to myself? What's the point? I'm not good enough for him, I'll never be what he wants. I try so hard for nothing. I give my all for nothing. What am I doing? I'll miss him, of course. I'll miss days spent together. But I'm running in place, Moving but going nowhere. It'll hurt. It always hurts. But it's time to end this. I'm getting nowhere. Maybe someday, He'll come back to me And take me for who I am. But today is not that day, And I must close this book.